1 Feb 2012
This month I am delighted to have Judy Dippel as my guest writer. I met Judy several years ago at a writers’ conference. We have become good friends and are collaborating on a book for boomer women. You can learn more about Judy, her writing and speaking at www.judydippel.com
7 NEW HABITS to Get Unstuck
Be True to Yourself. The Result is a Happier You and Happier Year
Do you already feel stuck in “the stuff” that makes your days crazy, and it’s only weeks into 2012? Are you beating yourself up, or dreading the day ahead?
You can create a few new habits to change old struggles or frustrations. The smallest changes can have a huge impact. Dump negative self-talk, replace it with real truth. You are good enough. You are able to take charge of yourself. Remember this. You DO have choices, and I encourage you to take responsibility for them. None of us need to spend this year overloaded all the time: physically, mentally, emotionally … even spiritually, that is not God’s desire for any of us.
The very slightest shift in daily choices can create changes in all of us that soon become healthy new habits to free us of burdens, and bring personal confirmation of being in control of the priorities and values of our lives. These then evolve into a totally better attitude about how we view our days, which bring greater peace when we lay our heads on the pillow each night.
If these are new habits that can help you, try one, or try them all. Print them, post them where you can see them, and pass them on to every friend you know who can use encouragement in these areas. Even the most subtle changes in the way you think, and what you choose to do, make it a happier new year, and definitely a more contented you.
Worry vs. Problem Solving: How can you tell which you are doing? Ask yourself if you can influence, control, or create change in the situation. If you can, then start taking your chosen action tomorrow. If this is not possible, it is worry and a waste of time. Let it go, divert your thoughts. Learn to tell which it is, and choose to act accordingly. Do it for you!
Eliminate the Need to Compete: Trust yourself; know your values. Your life, your kids, your career, your marriage, your activities don’t have to look like, or keep up with your friends.
Obligations or Commitments: Ask yourself, “Does this energize or drain me?” “Who will care or remember tomorrow?” Measure your decision with the two questions, then ask yourself, who will remember you were or weren’t there after 10 minutes, 10 days, 10 weeks? Will your presence truly make an important difference to anyone or something? Sometimes, (but not always) it’s simply our pride, or our inability to say “no.”
Can’t Decide Between Two Things? Flip a coin. Choose heads or tails. While in the air, which do you inwardly hope it will be? That is your true answer.
Rid Resentment that Consumes Your Head and Heart: Do the opposite—strive to let go of the hold bitterness, anger and toxic emotions have on you. Commit to asking this question when resentment pops into your head. What do I have to be grateful for today? Like my 8 year-old granddaughter says to me, “What was your favorite thing today, Grandma?” (She has been a great example to me.) Now, sincerely thank God for it, and feel greater appreciation as you fall asleep each night. Sweet dreams!
Information, Stimulation Overload: Carve out at least one evening each week. Turn it off, tune it out. Cell phones: none of us are that important. TV’s: DVR it for tomorrow. PC’s, Social Media … whatever! Shut it down. Commit to experience what quiet feels like, (you may have forgotten), enjoy simple pleasures: read a book, totally focus on you and/or your relationships—play board games, take a walk, simply let it all go! Laugh and love. Feel the relief … especially if you’ve also been successful in creating the healthy habits above.
Accept Your Circumstances, Seek and Trust God: There are incredible challenges all around, and many are beyond what I can imagine coping with; I don’t pretend to know how your life feels. But the only choice is to walk forward one-day-at-a-time, knowing you (and God) can make it. Appreciate your stamina, and your choice to face it with courage and faith. Easier times are ahead. It’s equally hard and healing, but you can do it!